We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
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I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
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There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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