youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Let's get the cat blown out
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
