The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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