I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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