Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
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