I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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