My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize