Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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