I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
