Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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