Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize