You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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