i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
