i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
USA USA USA
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.