I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.