Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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