Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
