shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
