if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize