and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize