dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize
