Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
