having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
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Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
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You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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