..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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