just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize