Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
