Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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