OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
