so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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