Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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