dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize