go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
it's great music for shaving your balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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