I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Randomize
