you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
