I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
