I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize