we have pet lesbian snakes
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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