He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
