THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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