btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize