Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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