I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize