that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Just puked most of my soul out..
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
