Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
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just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
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not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.