YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
