I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Randomize