I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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