pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
