just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
pray to the hookup gods
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
