I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
