Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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