Fine. I'll sleep in my office
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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